Girl Talk: What Can I Do With My Hair?

I’m in a hair crisis. For one thing, I’ve moved down south into even worse heat and humidity than I had in Memphis. It was bad enough that I had kinky, frizzy hair for 3 months out of the year, now I’m back to having it 5-6 months out of the year. What’s a girl to do? When I was younger and lived down here, I hated my hair. For awhile, I wore a wig. Yes, I just didn’t deal with it. I got a shag wig for Christmas and wore that. Then, for another 5 or so years, I straightened it with a blow dryer and so much hair spray that I looked like I had a helmet on my head. It was the only way to keep it from frizzing and curling back up. Now, I’m faced with this struggle again, and I hate it. Not only do I have the same frizzy, curly, kinky stuff that I was born with, but now I have gray aging hair to contend with, too. It sucks.

Since 1998 I’ve been wearing my hair really short. I moved to Seattle in ’98, and I had to have a style that I could wear wet because it rained all the time. I went super short in the fashion of Halle Berry and Sharon Stone. I hated it for the first 3 months. It was too much face and not enough hair. Eventually, I got used to it, though, and loved it. I kept going shorter and shorter until I almost had no hair at all. It was then that I embraced my curl. Even really short, my hair had some movement to it. And, I got complimented a LOT on my short “do.” In the last year or so, I’ve wanted to change up a bit. I want some of my curls back. With aging starting to show up on my face, I think the curl will add a little softness around the edges.

When I was in high school, I decided to let it go curly. Barbra Streisand had a “fro” in A Star is Born, and I followed her lead. I actually never really liked it, but it was much easier than the hair spray helmet that took me an hour to construct every morning. Today, I don’t want to go that long – I don’t think – because my hair is just too thick, and I think the weight of my hair weighs down my face. Keeping my hair short gives the illusion that my sagging face is not sagging so much. So, I’m trying to keep it short. In addition to the new weather issue that screws up the texture of my hair, I have to find a new hairdresser. My hair is actually easy to cut, but it’s hard for me to find a hairdresser that won’t go too short. My hair is so thick that it looks like it is long. When they start cutting, they cut too much, and then it shrinks up. The last one told me it looked top-heavy, but then when she got to cutting it, she exclaimed, “It looks like it’s long, but it’s really not.” Then, she commenced to cutting it too short. I’ll give her another try on Saturday. We’ll see what happens.

This weekend I saw a gal with short curly hair with a scarf tied on her head. It looked so cute. I told Keri that I should try to wear a scarf like that. I’ve tried it before and thought it looked stupid, but I thought I’d give it another shot. I’ve got some of those Sweaty Bands for running that are these really cute, feminine headbands made of fabric with a velvet backing. I wore a couple of those this weekend, and I loved them. They broke up the sea of hair on my head with a little color and seemed to keep it from blowing up so big. So, I’m experimenting with the look this week. I’ve tried scarves, thin headbands and thick ones.

In the last couple of years, I’ve realized that my hair is very much like black hair. I’ve started using ethnic hair care products because they have more moisture, and they really work well with coarse, thick, curly, frizzy hair like mine. I love them. The last product I used has been phenomenal. It smells like coconut and is a gel. It goes on heavy and is absorbed into my hair. It adds moisture and shine and allows the curl in my hair to do its thing. I’ve also started putting olive oil in it at night. I just take about a tablespoon of the stuff in my hands, rub them together and rub it through my hair. By the next morning, it’s completely absorbed, and my hair is not nearly as frizzy.

I’ve got a hair appointment Saturday. I’m more than a little anxious about it. I hope I can communicate to her that I just want it trimmed a little. Hairdressers love curly hair, but, unless they have it on their head, they have no idea how it behaves. It always gets shorter when it dries. When it rains and gets humid, it gets thick and frizzy. When it’s winter time, it’s manageable and soft and shiny. Everyday is a new day with my hair. That’s why you see me wear a lot of hats. There are a lot of bad hair days, plus I just like to mix it up a bit. There’s no way I can wear a ponytail or pull it back. The scarves and headbands may give me some more options. Any other ideas, girls?

7 thoughts on “Girl Talk: What Can I Do With My Hair?

  1. A couple…

    First, find a hairdresser who has curly hair. Michael, the fellow who cuts Mary H’s, does, and you can tell that he completely understands it. Of course, he’s just great at cutting hair, as those who’ve admired mine for the past 30 years have seen.

    Second, check out black stylists. If their products work so well, they may have insight into cutting/managing yours. Please, don’t let them break out the irons and straighteners, tho!!!

  2. Your short hair is very becoming. You have a gorgeous face and look great in hats! I have short hair and I look awful in ball caps. I think we women always look for greener pastures when it comes to hair. Mine is neither curly nor staight so I have to blow dry it. If I dont it’s flippy in all the wrong ways and flyaway city. Good luck with the humidity. I think no matter the texture, no girl likes humidity when it comes to hair.

    • Haha… You are right. I have people tell me all the time how lucky I am to have curly hair. I accept the compliment, and I know there are advantages, but there are some things I hate, too! Ongoing saga 🙂

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