The Act of Letting Go

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

This morning I’m posting a listing for my diamond ring on eBay and am a bit reflective about how that ring was created. The cocktail ring is comprised of two diamonds in a white gold design. I’ve often been complimented on it. It is unique, and the two diamonds sit a bit of a distance apart in a swirly elongated pattern. I had it custom-made after my second divorce. I wanted a unique and modern piece to showcase that beautiful diamond. But the jeweler noticed my diamond necklace which was made from the diamond in my first wedding band and offered that it would be even lovelier with two. I took their advice, and the one-of-a-kind ring was created.

I didn’t think I would ever want to part with this ring. It is symbolic of a huge piece of my story. I invested in my marriages, and I worked really hard to make them last. My first husband and I  got married when I was 23, and we decided to just have wedding bands. After we were married 7 years, he came home one day and said he was going to get some jewelry cleaned, and he thought I might want my rings cleaned. I thought it was odd because he never really did stuff like that, but I went along with it. The next day he brought it home and put it on the dresser. I didn’t notice until later when I picked it up how shiny it had become. It was a really lovely gesture. I had the diamond made into a pendant after our divorce. It was my first diamond, and it was very special.

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAMy second husband purchased the second diamond at a small, local jewelry store in Southwest Michigan called McCoy Brothers Jewelers. It was recommended to me by several local people. The two men who ran it were gemologists and were throwbacks from the 60s. You had to call to see if they were open because they didn’t keep regular business hours. If they wanted to close, they closed. They made their own jewelry and did not accept credit. If you wanted their jewelry, you paid cash only or put it on lay-away. But, their jewelry is stunning. As I got to know them, I realized that their jewelry hobby supported their main hobby which was traveling all over the world collecting unusual stones and rocks. They had an entire room in the back with stones from the most amazing places. They were so cool, and the ring was absolutely beautiful. The band was formed to look like a ribbon with the solitaire sitting right on top. It sat in a my jewelry box for a year before I had the heart to do something with it.

Over the years, my friends have sold their wedding bands and diamonds. It’s such a personal decision whether or not to keep it. With both of mine, it took me a while to decide. I have been noodling this decision on whether or not to sell it for about 6 months. The reality is that the sentimental value has now worn off for me. I saw the new ring as a symbol of creating something new and unusual from my history. I’ve thought of it as a wedding ring for myself. I’ve since bought my own diamond earrings and given the ones my ex gave me to his daughter as a graduation gift. I wanted her to have them since they originated from her father. I am sentimental. I hang on to things long after they have lost their usefulness because of their symbolism.

I am in a time of transition. I’m not sure where I’m headed, but I know that something inside of me has already transformed. The outside ingredients of my life will in time fit that new picture. This move here has given me cause to re-think the way I live my life, and with the internal changes that are happening in my heart, I know that I want a different kind of life. I am in an exploration mode, and I’m beginning to enter a disassembling mode. I can feel the letting go happening in a number of areas. I’m letting go of people that don’t work for me anymore, and I’m seeking new spirits for playmates. I’m cleaning out closets and getting rid of things that no longer serve me. I’m cleaning out my diet and letting go of habits that slow me down. And, all of a sudden, I have become drawn to closing the chapter of my life that has long been over. It’s time that those diamonds move on to light up another beautiful face. They served well for me. They were physical evidence and sparkly celebration of bridging that chasm between who I was and the person I came to be. May God bless their journey into their next heart. Oh yeah… and may that journey be worth a lot of money for me! 🙂

P.S. If you’re interested, let me know. I’ll tell where you where to locate it for your Christmas shopping list!

2 thoughts on “The Act of Letting Go

Talk to me, please...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s