I’ve been going to physical therapy for three weeks. I decided to get an x-ray on my creaky right knee to make sure nothing was injured. My nurse practitioner said there was just some degenerative stuff that is normal in the aging process. She suggested I might see a physical therapist to see if it would help. I’ve never been to physical therapy but I thought it might be a good investment since I was having a number of little problems on my right side. The words of my running coach, Jessica, kept haunting me. She always said if one thing is off balance in your body, it can start to affect everything else up the chain.
Sarah, my physical therapist, is a runner, too. She was very excited to meet me and said helping people to keep doing the things they love was her passion. I was shocked when she watched me walk and said she knew exactly what was wrong. I was weak in my glutes and my quads, and I had been overcompensating by overusing the muscles in the side of my leg. As a result, my IT band has gotten really tight and has been pulling on my knee. In her opinion, my plantar fasciitis I’ve had for the last year, the issues with my knee and the nagging pain I was having running would be gone if I took care of this issue. Surely it wouldn’t be that easy.
I was in until she started me on some exercises. Holy cow! Waking up muscles that have been sleeping for awhile hurts. I kept thinking of the tin man on the Wizard of Oz as he creaks and stumbles after years of being rusted in the rain. There was no magic oil for me. But there was a way to fix it. That first day after she tortured me for an hour and educated me on my issue, she sent me home with two exercises to strengthen my glutes. I was to do 3 sets of 15 two times per day.
The first one was a standing hip adduction which was designed to strengthen my standing leg. She taught me how to externally rotate my knee in the correct form and lift up through my core so I wasn’t using my lower back. In theory it seemed so simple, but my body had been collapsing into the wrong position for so long that breaking that habit was excruciating. I was literally exhausted after the first two days and everything in my body hurt. The second one was a clamshell which Jessica has had me doing for a long time. But I was doing it wrong. In fact, Sarah laughed when she saw me doing it. I was using my upper leg to lift, and the exercise is supposed to strengthen your glutes. She told me that if felt like there was a mean little elf chewing on my butt, I was doing it right.
I returned to see her three days later, and her eyes lit up when she saw my results. She is sure that we can fix this problem, and I’ll be back to running and doing whatever I want pain-free. Her excitement got me motivated, and it’s a good thing because she gave me another two exercises and the next time added two more. In fact, I was starting to dread going in because I got a longer list of those exercises every time I went. It’s really messed with my regular exercise routine because I’m exhausted from those. And I hate that evil little elf.
My plantar fasciitis is gone. I was inflaming that tendon by landing on it the way I was. It started going away immediately. When I do lunges in my workouts now, I’m much more stable. And on a hike in the dunes last week, I was noticeably stronger. My balance is better when I’m doing yoga, and I know how to correct it if it’s not. That really tight muscle on my leg has softened and doesn’t yank on my knee anymore. I don’t know if it’s my imagination, but I actually think the appearance of my legs is changing. They just seem less wiggly. That’s a perk!
I now have a long list of exercises to do, but it doesn’t feel like a long list of exercises. I know the benefit of each one, and it feels like a small investment in my future active self to pick one and do it. The exercises are getting more advanced, so they are a little more interesting. And the little elf has become a bit more friendly and a lot less hungry. My downtime at home is now spent squeezing my glutes, rotating my knees and strengthening my quads. No more watching TV laying down!
I have a couple more weeks of therapy, but we are both encouraged. Sarah told me that she hates it when people just start giving up activities they love as they age under the assumption that they can’t do them anymore. Most of the time there is some imbalance somewhere that could at the very least relieve some pain and in the best case get them back into action. She thinks in my case, we can totally correct what was happening. I’ve spent a bit of money on this and a good deal of time, but it seems like a great investment to keep me doing the things I love to do. Who knows? Maybe there’s another 5K in my future. I can visualize outrunning that evil little hungry elf.
On the way out of Chicago yesterday I decided to try again to get to Damato’s Bakery. When I tried Friday there was so much snow that I couldn’t find a place to park. A big banner on their website proclaimed that they would be serving Pepper and Egg Sandwiches every day. Hmmmm… I assumed there must be a tradition there for such a simple combination to deserve a banner. I knew what I was going to try for breakfast.
It was still difficult to park. Massive trucks and workmen were parked right in front of the bakery clearing snow nearby. It was a massive undertaking. I found a spot in the neighborhood and slip-slid my way to the ATM outside. Damato’s is a cash only establishment so they have an ATM right outside the front door. When you want a cannoli, you want a cannoli. Money is not going to be an issue.
I got my regular cannoli, one of their amazing Cappuccinos, the Pepper and Egg Sandwich with Provolone, Eggplant Parmesan to take home for later and some really nice looking biscotti. I love being in that place. The service is always friendly, and it smells so good. It wasn’t crowded yesterday so I was able to spend some time chatting with the lady at the counter. She said there is never any place to park there… snow or not.
I was starving so I tried my sandwich when I got to the car. The simple ingredients of sautéed peppers and onions with eggs laid out on divine French bread was the perfect combination. As with everything else, I think the quality of the French bread determines your experience. This bread was soft on the inside with a perfect crispy crust. Slathered in butter, it was the perfect platform for the peppers and eggs. Apparently this sandwich is a Lenten tradition in Chicago in the Italian community. A Google search confirmed it is also a tradition for Italians in New York.
I found the above recipe video on how to make this wonderful but super-easy sandwich. If you like hot, young Italians from New York – er, I mean hot pepper and egg sandwiches – you’ll want to watch this. Either way I think you’ll be inspired to find one and give them a try. They are delicious! (And by that I mean either the hot, young Italian or the sandwich. Or both would be even better!)
Thursday’s calendar was blank. Nothing. Nada. It’s not unusual these days. I wake up and the agenda is all mine. Unfortunately, there’s not a lot going on otherwise, so sometimes I opt to sit it out and spend a long morning drinking coffee. I’ll get on and off rabbit trails in the news or on social media, read part of a book, call a friend or take Ashok for a walk. On a wild day, I’ll go for a ride up the coast and find a hike.
We got a LOT of snow this week. I think there’s about a foot and a half on the ground in my yard. Poor Ashok is up to her private parts in the white stuff when she goes out to do her business. I built her a little trail in the yard but she sort of snubs her nose at it. “I’m a dog,” she snorts. “I’m gonna run in the snow.” When I let her out Thursday and saw that we had more snow and my calendar was blank I decided I needed to go north. If some snow was good then more snow was better.
Silver Lake State Park and Little Sable Point Lighthouse
I thought I might drive up to Ludington State Park but on the way I saw a sign for Silver Lake State Park. I’d never been there, and the internet said there was a lighthouse. So, we got off the beaten path, drove down a few snow-covered country roads and ended up in a lovely quiet beachside community. Of course most places were deserted. Snow blanketed sidewalks and steps. The road was plowed but definitely still covered in snow. The dunes signaled the lake was near, and we followed the little road until a beautiful brick lighthouse rose up from the sand.
The waves are frozen from the most recent storms and deep freeze. This is my favorite look for that magnificent lake. Raw and ragged with huge frozen balls of ice submerged in frozen puddles, the ice formations make me think of the moon. I’ve never been to the moon, so I have no idea if this is what it looks like, but it still makes me think of the moon. Ashok and I climbed some dunes which would have been easier with some snowshoes and then eased on down by the lake for a closer look. We had the place to ourselves and I wondered what it must be like in the summer with the beachgoers all around.
Country Dairy in New Era MI
I decided I’d like to head east to see the Manistee-Huron National Forest. I thought I might find an icy river or hike a mile or so on the North Country Trail in the snow. On the way we passed a local dairy that has a wonderful cafe and gift shop. I was surprised they were open in February, but they were. A grilled cheese and pint of chocolate milk later, we were back on the road again.
We found a lovely trailhead on M20 with ski and snow shoe tracks. The snow was really deep so we hiked about 20 minutes or so and came back. It was so quiet and peaceful there. We drove through the forest to Croton Dam and hiked on the NCT there, too. The river was lovely. I remembered hiking that section the first summer I was in Michigan with a friend. We got lost and a 7-mile hike turned into an exhausting 13-miler with a lot of road walking. Thursday was much more fun.
River Stop Cafe in Newaygo MI
I stopped in Newaygo at a lovely little coffee shop/cafe for a cappuccino before I headed home. The day was a perfect sampler of some of my favorite things. We got to see sand dunes, Lake Michigan, a beautiful river, several doe, took a hike in the woods and one on the beach, drove through a beautiful snowy countryside and finished it all off with the perfect cappuccino. Oh yeah, and a pint of chocolate milk makes everything better. I couldn’t fill a day more perfectly.
I just could not take it anymore. I had a meltdown talking to my coach yesterday, and she led me to take a small step that would make me feel a little more in control. I wanted a taste of civilization …. a city … something different than the same four walls I’ve been looking at for almost a year.
Of course I would love to go to the Hotel Monaco in Chicago. But Chicago feels a bit overwhelming given the COVID situation. I’ve been wanting to explore Grand Rapids so I found a sweet little pet-friendly boutique hotel downtown and made a reservation. My spirits lifted a little as soon as I hit send. I know it won’t be the same as it would have been pre-COVID, but it definitely will be a change. As much as I love our St. Joe, I just need to have some conveniences that a rural lakeside town does not offer.
The Blue Bridge
The hour and 20-minute drive flew by as I listened to one of the Joe Pickett mysteries and enjoyed the passing snowy landscape. Ashok slept and seemed content just to be away from the cats for an hour or a day. It was 12 years ago the day after Valentine’s Day that I adopted my girl. I remember picking her up at the woman’s house who found her. She hopped in the passenger seat and looked at me quizzically. I promised her I’d take her camping and running and hiking and that she would have a great life. In turn, she has given me way more than I ever gave her. So, we’ll celebrate Valentine’s Day together iduring a pandemic in a hotel in Grand Rapids MI. I don’t know what we’ll do, but we’ll figure it out.
Sam welcomed me to the AC Hotel and gave me instructions on where to park. He saw Ashok from the car and told me he had a treat all ready for her. Ashok was so excited to be greeted and loved on right off the bat. We unpacked and headed out for a walk on the Blue Bridge which crosses the river downtown. It was cold and beautiful, and there were quite a few other walkers. Two men were running sprints across the bridge, and I found myself envious that I can no longer keep up that kind of pace.
We walked downtown and past the ice skating rink in the Rosa Parks Circle. After returning to the hotel and assessing the lay of the land I asked Matt and Sam where I should eat. Matt was so enthusiastic about the Cuban Street Food that they serve at the hotel that I decided to stay in and take his advice. He treated me like a queen as I was the only guest. I got a short tour of the amenities in the lobby. Comfy pit sofas piled high with pillows surround a cozy fireplace. He showed me how to make my own Nespresso and pointed out the library. I’ll be cozied up by that fire with my coffee tomorrow morning. I can hardly wait.
The chef hooked me up with a sampler of small plates of Cuban Street Food. My favorite was the Provoleta with crispy chorizo, curtido salsa and crostini. The bubbling bowl of melted cheese topped with the most flavorful chorizo I have ever eaten was worth it’s messiness. I’d pile big globs of cheese on top of the crostini and top it with the chorizo and salsa. I ran out of it way too fast but didn’t dare ask for more. I did, however, ask for an order of the Churros with hot chocolate. Every bite of everything they brought out was outstanding. My next trip might be to Cuba.
Cuban Street Food at the AC Hotel … YUMMY!
My friend Liz and I tried to get reservations for tomorrow night, but with restaurants only booking at 25% capacity it was too late for us to find anything at a decent hour. We decided to get takeout and eat in this beautiful lobby. We might even get a good cup of espresso as a finisher. I know tomorrow I’ll be enjoying some time in that library and in front of the fireplace. I may not be able to get out and do a lot, but staying in at this lovely hotel is definitely an upgrade from my living room sofa.
So, I’m here. My frame of mind is already improved. The thing I’ve missed most about traveling is the people I meet. It’s harder to meet people in masks because it’s more difficult to communicate. But Matt and Sam were so happy to have the hotel open that they went above and beyond to be friendly. I don’t care if I don’t leave the hotel at all. Enjoying some good food, a nice environment and having inspiration to write is a treat. And it’s kind of cool to walk across a blue bridge and watch the ice skaters, too.
More to come…..
This morning’s meditation in the Calm App was on Distraction. I can’t tell you a lot about it because I was so distracted for most of it, but the narrator said that our brains are extraordinary machines. The one exception is that they are so sensitive to interruptions. ‘How interesting‘, I thought. But then I immediately started worrying that I didn’t have enough muesli for breakfast.
That’s meditation. Many people don’t meditate because they can’t stop their thinking. That’s actually the point. You can’t stop your thinking. That’s what the mind does. It thinks. And when it finds a wide open timeframe when you are are sitting there doing nothing, it thinks even more. Meditation practice is not about stopping your thinking. It’s about stopping yourself from going down the rabbit hole. It’s a practice that encourages a looser relationship to our thoughts.
We are so entertained by our own thoughts. I believe it’s our greatest addiction, and it leads to all other addictions. After all, do you ever grab that brownie – or drink or caffeine or engage in a hookup – without thinking you want it or that you need it to distract you from something else you’d rather not think about? I’ve spent a large portion of my life following my fickle thoughts down whatever rabbit hole they have opened. How much sleep have I wasted racing through the vast tunnels of my mind? And to what end?
Thoughts come and go and are often contradictory or nonsensical. It’s as if my brain is lobbing ideas to see which ones stick. I have to decipher what is grounded in reality and what are just random thoughts. A yoga teacher once said, “The brain that is calling you a fat pig because you ate that piece of apple pie is the same brain that told you 15 minutes ago that you deserved a treat.” Our job is to decide which of those thoughts are meaningful input and which are just distractions. The power is in the deciding.
In the grasp of my anxious mind, I listen to too many suggestions and judgments thrown at me by my brain. Rarely are any of these informative. When I get serious about dealing with my anxiety, I increase my meditation practice. My meditation practice develops my concentration muscle so I am NOT reacting to my churning thoughts. I have the power to decide if the input is meaningful or just junk. That can be the difference between a good night’s sleep and a restless one or a wasted life and a meaningful one.
My hiking buddy Liz and I decided to go hiking at Muskegon State Park yesterday. The sun was out and, for a Michigan January day, the temps were mild. I just met Liz in a Hikerbabes community on Facebook. She has recently moved to the Grand Rapids area, and I’m still in the friend-making zone in Southwest Michigan. It’s been fun exploring a new friendship and having someone to hike with who is dog-friendly and eager to get outdoors in Michigan.
We parked at Snug Harbor and decided to hike around Muskegon Lake and end up on the Ridge Trail to catch some glorious views. There was snow on the ground, and it was fun to catch glimpses of the ice fisherman on the lake. The lake wasn’t frozen through. In fact, at the edge near our start, there was open water. We couldn’t believe people would actually hike out on that ice and fish when it seemed likely some of it was not frozen. But those concerns came from a Southern girl and a Midwestern city girl with no ice fishing knowledge. Maybe we just didn’t get it.
Our hiking conversation turned to binge-watching Sex and the City, the travesties and adventures of online dating and the challenges and joys of being footloose and fancy-free during a pandemic. Ashok patiently hiked along with us enjoying the shoreline ice and grateful when we stopped to take in a view. The sun was warming, and the snow was deep enough to be pretty but not deep enough to cause us issues.
As we left the shoreline, we opted to hike across the dunes off-trail. To be honest, we spent our time trying to avoid steep climbs rather than following the trail, and we were doing pretty well. We finally meandered to the top of the dunes. The views were amazing. Muskegon Lake was clearly visible, and to our right Lake Michigan glimmered in the sun. We ran into a few other groups and started to head back on the easy trail.
I reached to grab my phone for a picture, and it was not there. I tried every pocket. It was not there. I even tried pockets I would have never used hoping for some dumb reason I had stashed it there. Somewhere among the dating stories and the worry about the ice fisherman, I had dropped my iPhone. And a quick run back a few yards told me it wasn’t close by.
I was so embarrassed. I thought back to how we hiked across the dunes sans trail. The piles of snow and sand behind us stretched for what seemed like miles. Images of trekking across the Sahara desert flashed through my mind. They were quickly overtaken by estimates of how much it would cost to replace my phone and a search of my memory of whether or not I’d bought the insurance.
Liz asked if I had had “Find my iPhone” turned on, and I did. We tried to sign me in, but it kept asking for the verification code they just texted me. Well, if I had my phone to get a text I wouldn’t be trying to find it. Somehow security has gotten so ridiculous that it doesn’t even make sense anymore. Somewhere in the sand and snow a text landed on my phone with a code that I needed. We tried calling my phone in the hopes it was nearby and could be heard. It wasn’t.
We ended up calling Apple. It took about 30 minutes to get through as we walked across the sand trying to catch a glimpse the tracks of a pair of humans and one dog. The agent across the world sent us back to the webpage, but we got the same result. He did something on his end, and we were finally able to get through. So now we had a visual of my phone, and it appeared it was back in the car. That really would have been embarrassing, but I knew I had my phone when I took pictures earlier. Nothing seemed to be working out. We decided the best thing to do was to at least go back to the shoreline and hope I dropped it back there.
Lake Michigan sand dunes are challenging to climb. They are towering piles of sand that are not incremental in their rise. You can go in between the dunes to some extent, but you have to climb. When you climb these steep piles of sand, it shifts beneath your feet. And when you descend, you slide. At one point we both fell down trying to get up one of the dunes. And I slid down one on my butt. By the time we were out of the dunes, our legs and our glutes were toast. We finally made it back to the place where I took the last picture but found no phone. In fact, we never even found our trail. It was disheartening.
I had accepted the fact that I would not find my phone. I was just going to have to cough up the money and get a new phone. I knew if I got bent out of shape about it, it wouldn’t help. Then Liz realized my phone was not located back at the car. Once we got to the lake, the GPS shifted and it looked totally different. Or maybe we were looking at it wrong. Whatever the case, we had a lock on the location now. It was back in the dunes, and we were on the way back to the car. But with a location and what looked like a road that got us close to it, we had a glimmer of hope.
We got back to the car and drove over to this road. I offered to come back today. I didn’t want to make her hunt for it, and I felt bad about all of this drama. But she said she was determined to find this phone, and we were going to do it. We both decided it was an adventure, and it was going to have a happy ending. Even if I ended up buying a shiny new phone, we were going to have fun doing it.
So we spent the next hour navigating through the forest and over the dunes trying to find that little dot in the middle of the sand dunes. If we could find our trail, we surely could find that phone. Up and down dunes, around and through grass and trees we searched. We laughed about talking with that agent on the other side of the planet while we were standing in the wilderness. We shared stories of things lost and found. And we despaired and we searched. Sometimes the GPS freaked out and put us in the middle of Lake Michigan. Then it would straighten itself out. And our little GPS dot kept getting closer to the iPhone dot. Finally we were really close. We climbed over the top of a dune, and I spotted our trail. There were dog prints and at least two sets of people prints. Liz went one way, and I went the other. Not 100 yards away, I saw my trusty iPhone lying facedown in the snow.
It WAS an adventure. Our feet hurt and our muscles were starting to get sore. We were both starving and had long drives back home. But we were both so happy to have utilized our technology and our wits to find that phone. We even thought about calling our helper in India and telling him we found it.
Driving home I reflected on my day and what I could learn from this little adventure. I thought of my current job search. The number of options I have feels a bit like a lost iPhone in miles of sand dunes. I literally could make a hundred different choices and none of them would be wrong. Much like we traversed the dunes, I’ve opted to go off trail this time. I’ve used technology, my friends and other resources to help me navigate. I often question my decisions and wonder whether or not I will find my way. I’m getting closer to that dot of where I will land, but I also know that if I don’t get there – wherever there is – I will be okay. I may have to spend more money, and I may have to try something new, but, whatever happens, it will be an adventure. And, whatever happens, I will handle it.